Dear Oz,

It dawned on me this morning that perhaps you did not realize that the basket on the kitchen counter does not, in fact, contain additional toys for you.  Further, the pink orbs you have been batting around and the tan oblong bits you've hidden are not, as you seem to believe, crinkle balls or plushy mice, but rather shallots and ginger.  Not cheap, dear - not cheap.  Do please stop.  Suez.  P.S. If, on the other hand, you are concocting a delicious gourmet meal for us to share, please disregard this memo.